The United States Redneck Special Forces

BUMPED

Originally posted July 2007.

The United States Redneck Special Forces:

The Pentagon announced TODAY the formation of a new 500-man elite fighting unit called the United States Redneck Special Forces (USRSF).

97a45-redneck.jpg

These boys will be dropped off in Iraq and have been given only the following facts about terrorists:

1. The season opened today.
2. There is no limit.
3. They taste just like chicken.
4. They don’t like beer, pickups, country music or Jesus.
5 . They are directly responsible for the death of Dale Earnhardt .

The Pentagon expects the problem in Iraq to be over by Friday.

Hat tip: My Hubby, who emailed this to me. I didn’t write any part of this.

UPDATE (January 18, 2008):

News from the field:

Being a USRSF operative in the mid-east mud-flap brigade, I have to say that it feels darn good to finally get some recognition up in this Mo-Fo. Things have been getting a little dicey around these parts as of late. We ran out of Kodiak around last October and the Iraqi chew taste like something out of a Eddie Murphy Love Pump. Although, a tin of Skoal did save Cpl. Billy’s life in a most unexpected way.
We appreciate the warm Milwaukee’s Best light you all been shipping out monthly, as well as the Yosemite Sam tank tops. I will update you further in the upcoming weeks, but for now, I got me a Sherpa to molest. Later.

UPDATE:

USRSF Sgt. Cletus inspects the troops’ improvised beer can batons:

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43 thoughts on “The United States Redneck Special Forces

  1. Cuffy, it may be time for another Niblets, update.

    Last we knew, she was wreaking havoc in St. Louis Gardens. Who would have ever guessed, she and her gang would be as far east as PA.

    Like

  2. I still see trucks almost every day with a #3 decal on the back window. It’s a pretty safe bet that he wouldn’t be too happy with junior leaving DEI to go be teammates with Jeff Gordon at Hendrick.

    Like

  3. Pingback: Finally, some REAL help on its way to Iraq…Go, USRSF!!

  4. Pingback: Grizzly Groundswell » Finally, some REAL help on its way to Iraq…Go, USRSF!!

  5. That’s a Lahti L-39 twenty-millimeter semiautomatic anti-tank rifle, an antique weapon dating back to the Second World War.

    Like

  6. Interesting.

    Dave in Texas is going to want to talk to you about that.

    He’s a bit of a gun aficionado.

    He’s not gonna like being shown up by a girl.

    Like

  7. Being a USRSF operative in the mid-east mud-flap brigade, I have to say that it feels darn good to finally get some recognition up in this Mo-Fo. Things have been getting a little dicey around these parts as of late. We ran out of Kodiak around last October and the Iraqi chew taste like something out of a Eddie Murphy Love Pump. Although, a tin of Skoal did save Cpl. Billy’s life in a most unexpected way.
    We appreciate the warm Milwaukee’s Best light you all been shipping out monthly, as well as the Yosemite Sam tank tops. I will update you further in the upcoming weeks, but for now, I got me a Sherpa to molest. Later.

    Like

  8. Come on guys…just go to your nearest Army recruiting station and ask about the USRSF. They’ll set you up. You two sound like the type they’d steer that way, anyhow.

    Like

  9. Pingback: Brad Brown » Blog Archive » 24 Random Facts about Brad Brown

  10. Pingback: The United States Redneck Special Forces « Anna Lyttiger

  11. man i sure dnt no much about this innner net but i tiped in redneck and i found some good websites like this one yall kno anybody in alabama wantin to sell a 4wheeler or dirtbike aroun $900 or under

    Like

  12. oh my god this is the funniest shit ever. BS war, but reason #5 is fuckin funny. If your are out in the desert and come on a circle of law chairs, a cooler of beer and a radio playing NASCAR, what out, it’s a trap.

    Like

  13. WHAT’S UP FOLKS FROM THIS WEBBLOG. HOW IS IT GOING ?? SWEET …
    LET ME TELL YOU SOMETHING: WE ARE TRYING TO GET KNOW WHAT IS REALLY A RED NECK IN THE USA.
    CHEERS …

    Like

  14. Although they do smell like the wrong end of a sick goat and they do have an uncomfortable love for killing anything that disagrees with them, those Turbaned Terrors of the Middle-East do have the honor of discovering coffee. Well their goats did, at least. Ya gotta give them something for that… something in a little higher caliber, perhaps? Hey, where does an old Grunt sign on? The U.S.R.S.F must have a recruiter in the Ozarks! Seek The Core!!

    Like

  15. Pingback: Yankee Doodle « Kokomag's Blog

  16. thats not a real gun btw its a model ccreated by the military to help soliders understand the parts of the gun and how to assemble and clean an such- funny as hell though :D

    Like

  17. Pingback: Redneck Pics | Pafos Photos

  18. Hey guys i am starting a redneck army to be there if the government. Collapses i live in florida any one want to join

    Like

  19. You actually make it appear so easy with your presentation but I find this matter to be really one thing which I believe I
    would never understand. It seems too complex and very large for me.
    I am having a look forward for your subsequent post, I’ll try to get the hold of it!

    Like

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